Archive for March, 2010

VBAC Stories Part 3

For some reason Allah didn’t allow me the ability to breastfeed baby #4 and I became pregnant 5 mos after his birth.  I found out that a muslim sister was working at the clinic down the street from my house and I was so happy.  I went to see her for about 6 mos of  the pregnancy but the doctor over her head decided that she did not want to deliver the baby naturally due to my 2 C sections.  Now keep in mind my 1st c section was 18 yrs ago and the 2nd was 7 years ago and not only that I delivered a 9lb120z baby vaginal 6 mos ago.  WHAT!?  I basically told her no offense but I’m gonna have to go elsewhere.  I told the sister although I realize that there is a chance I could have a C Section I don’t want my options yanked off the table so early in the game.  I went right back to the doctors I had seen for the last pregnancy and they were more than willing to let me try for a VBAC since I proved them wrong once already LOL!  With this pregnancy I developed gestational diabetes again!  The doctors were of course concerned and every week would tease me that they were debating about me all the time.  

In my last month they sent me for 2 ultrasounds and I knew this baby was going to be bigger than my last one but the ultrasound said 8lbs 6oz and 2 weeks later it said 8lbs 13oz.  I knew it was wrong but I wasn’t going to tell them that.  The way I see it Allah was helping me, because if it said the true size they would have pushed me to have a ceserean.  Alhamdulillah 

At 38 weeks one of my Non Stress Tests didn’t go to well.  (Honestly I think she was just a lazy baby, because she is now and so are all my girls LOL!)  The doc decided she wanted to induce me to avoid risk of stillbirth.  So I made lot’s of istikhara and pretty much went in with the mindset that it is whatever Allah wants it to be.  Although I was beginning to doubt myself with the way all the doctors were acting in the delivery room.  They were more nervous than I was.  LOL!  It really doesn’t matter what you do it is truly up to Allah.  I just kept telling myself this and continued to make duaa.    I went in to be induced and was dialated 4cm so they just popped my water.   I didn’t have anything to eat and they wouldn’t let me eat until after delivery.  I told them even Ramadan wasn’t this difficult LOL!  I was sooo hungry and thirsty and weak.  When you are diabetic it is a lot rougher.  At one time I truly thought I was going to pass out and panicked.   I finally took the epidural.  I had no energy and they wouldn’t let me out of bed again.  I have to walk around when I’m in pain or it is too unbearable.  Masha Allah for those of you who endured it to the end. 

Well ofcourse the time came again to push but I couldn’t remember how and the baby was face up, and ofcourse I had no energy due to starvation.  The doc threatened me to get it right or I was going for surgery.  That’s all it took and after 3 pushes she was out.  Masha Allah. 

Now while I was in labor they were feeling my stomach and asking me how big I thought the baby was.  Astagfirallah but I knew she was well over my last baby but I told her a little bit bigger, maybe.  She weighed 10lbs 2ounces and the doctor said I lied to her.  I appologized but I told her it was for a good reason.  They weren’t too upset since everything turned out well. 

All I can say is Allahu Akbar that is all it truly is.  Allah was there for me eventhough I wasn’t the nicest pregnant lady. LOL!   I am thankful to my creator and I hope that I earned some forgiveness for my sins.  Please don’t take my story as medical advice as I am not a doctor.  Either way that you look at it whether you end up with a ceserean or a vaginal birth remember as muslims we believe everything was already written before we entered this world, my to c-sections were already decreed by Allah, so I am confident that I did nothing wrong as a woman and I have to accept what I have and work with it.  I know surgery is not fun but the most important thing really is ours and the babies safety.  So just keep reminding yourself it is as Allah wants it to be.  I don’t know how many times I have to tell myself this everyday.  Please make duaa for me and my family and I will do the same for you insha Allah.


I decided I wanted to take a break from having babies for a while after a miscarriage 18mos later.  Alhamdulillah, Allah granted me that wish for the next 7 years.  Then up popped baby number 4, to be honest I truly thought I was not going to have anymore after the last one.  Allah is the best of planners isn’t he? 

 We currently reside in PA. and I had a wonderful midwife throughout this pregnancy and I think she had more confidence than I did.  I was determined to go in without drugs and have this baby naturally.  The docs did keep a close eye on babies size this time and when they estimated him to be 9lb140z 1 week after my due date they decided that it was best for me to have another C-section.  I was devastated I cried and made dua to Allah and I told him that I will accept whatever is his plan because I knew it was truly up to him.  I was scheduled to go the next day and at 4 am I woke to my water breaking.  YES!  We went to the hospital and the docs were bombarding me with C-section, C-section, C-section.  They were saying again that he could have big shoulders or a big head and I might not be able to push him out.   All I could think was if Allah wanted me to have a C-section then my water wouldn’t have broken so I told them NO!  They told me they wanted to put a catheter in my back in case of an emergency.  I agreed and of course asked for the epidural because they wouldn’t let me out of bed, because my water was broke and the cord could fall out, whatever that means.   I was kind of worried that it would inhibit me from pushing again as it  did with baby #2. 

Earlier in the pregnancy I made a pouch to put Surah’s in and wore it during labor.  I got them from here

I also listened to quran during labor.  Even though I had an epidural I could still feel a lot of pressure during contractions and when it was time to push I could feel that too.  Then I think it was less than 30 minutes of pushing and my 4th child was born he was 9lbs 12oz.  The doctor said, “Mom knows best.”  Alhamdulillah, Allah is truly amazing.  By having the epidural I felt I was set up for failure again, but Allah made it so easy.

Please see part 3

As salamu alaikum

I know it’s been awhile since I’ve been here.  I finally had my fifth baby 2 months ago Al hamdulillah everything went as I had hoped it would.  Alhamdulillah!  As I just got done telling a sister after 11 years of being Muslim I am finally understanding that Allah is in full control.  I’m still working on it but it’s finally clicking in.  That’s the beauty of this deen always learning, always growing. 

A sister recently posted her succesful birth story on her blog and I thought what a great idea we all need support stories when we are going through a tough time and need to see that others made it through.  Here is the link to her story.

I’m going to break mine up into smaller posts since I have so many children and this would be too long to read in one sitting LOL!

So here goes my story ;

18 years ago I got pregnant with my first child, I was 18 myself and had no clue what was going on.  I was put in a room and told to lay on my back.  They popped my water and seen meconium was in it. My labor didn’t progress after 8cm and the baby was in distress, so I was rushed to an emergency c-section.   It was a nightmare.   I woke to the doctor telling me that I had a 10lb 11 oz baby,  I was so drugged up but I remember thinking they mixed up my baby with someone elses,  there was no way I had a baby that big.  Also the incision infected and reopened and had to heal that way.  I also had another infection that the docs couldn’t figure out what it was.  I was in the hospital for 2 weeks until my fever broke.   It was rough, I and my husband who was my boyfriend at the time, were not muslim and we were not planning to have anymore kids after that incident. 

9 years later, after many trials that led us to Islam and a better view on how our lives should be, we decided Insha Allah to have another baby.  I had no idea what a VBAC was all I wanted to know was did I have to have another C Section.  When I became pregnant the doc told me I would do fine to try for a VBAC.  I was very happy to hear that.  The labor did go beautifully, until I broke down at the end and begged for an epidural.  I was 9cm when they gave it to me and by the time I was numb it was time to push I couldn’t feel anything I was there for what seemed like hours pushing.  The babies heart rate was dropping so they told my husband that we had to get him out.  They said either a c section or the vacuum and he told them vacuum.  Alhamdulillah we had a healthy 9lb 10 0z boy.  Another big one!

18mos later I became pregnant again with our 3rd child.  We went to the docs but they told us there was a new law and they were not doing VBACS anymore.  I was devastated.  We did find a county hospital that was willing to let us go for it.   Throughout pregnancy I read labor and delivery books and did all kinds of research.  I was not going to do drugs this time, and I was not going to let them talk me into a c-section.  I ended up developing gestational diabetes with this one and the docs were not going to let me go to far past my due date because of the risk of stillbirth.  So the day the doc told me this I went upstairs for a Non stress test and was told that I was having contractions and that they would see about giving me pitocin.  The doc did an ultrasound before hand and estimated the baby to be 11lbs.  So she refused to induce my labor.  Then her and another doctor pretty much scared me to death when they told me all the risks of diabetic babies and I caved and cried and had a C Section that night.  The baby was 11lbs 12oz and Allah knows best whether I would have survived that had I went the other route.

please see part 2